"Drinking With A Florida Girl"  
A Mexican, an Arab, and a Florida girl are in the same bar.  
When the Mexican finishes his beer, he throws his glass in the air, pulls out his pistol, and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, 'In Mexico, our glasses are so cheap we don't need to drink with the same one twice.'  
The Arab, obviously impressed by this, drinks non-alcohol beer (cuz' he's a muslim!), throws it into the air, pulls out his AK-47, and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, 'In the Arab World, we have so much sand to make glasses that we don't need to drink with the same one twice either.'  
The Florida girl, cool as a cucumber, picks up her beer, downs it in one gulp, throws the glass into the air, whips out her 45, and shoots the Mexican and the Arab. Catching her glass, setting it on the bar, and calling for a refill, she says, ''In Florida, we have so many illegal aliens that we don't have to drink with the same ones twice.''
"Tickle Me Elmo" 
There is a factory in Northern Minnesota which makes the Tickle Me Elmo toys. The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms.  
This is a 'true story' about a new employee Lena who was hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory. She clocks in for her first day on the job, promptly at 8:00 am.  
That same day at 8:45 am there is a knock at the Personnel Manager's door. The Foreman throws open the door and begins to rant about the new Employee. He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole line is backing up, putting the entire production line behind schedule.  
The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for himself, so the 2 men march down to the factory floor. When they get there the line is so backed up that there are Tickle Me Elmo's all over the factory floor and they're really beginning to pile up.  
At the end of the line stands Lena surrounded by mountains of Tickle Me Elmo's. She has a roll of plush Red fabric and a huge bag of small marbles.  
The 2 men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece of fabric, wraps it around two marbles and begins to carefully sew the little package between Elmo's legs.  
The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter. After several minutes of hysterics he pulls himself together and approaches Lena ..  
''I'm sorry," he says to her, barely able to keep a straight face,''but I think you misunderstood the instructions I gave you at your interview yesterday...Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles".
"Only You"  
"Ramblin' Rose" 
Acker Bilk 
Designed & Compiled 
Ev & Els 
Reichserntedankfest rally (Thanksgiving Celebration of the Reich), 1934. This is the Reichserntedankfest of 1934 in Buckeberg. That year, 700,000 people participated.
                       The last Jew in Vinnitsa, 1941          
Do you know the difference between education and experience?  
Education is when you read the fine print.  
Experience is what you get when you don't.  
Aloha, God Bless.