"Insane Asylum Inmates"  
A doctor at an insane asylum decided to take his patients to a baseball game. For weeks in advance, he coached his patients to respond to his commands.  
When the day of the game arrived. Everything went quite well. As the national anthem started, the doctor yelled, "Up Nuts", and the patients complied by standing up.  
After the anthem, he yelled, "Down Nuts", and they all sat back down in their seats.  
After a home run was hit, the doctor yelled, "Cheer Nuts" They all broke out into applause and cheered.  
When the umpire made a particularly bad call against the star of the home team, the Doctor yelled, "Booooo Nuts" and they all started booing and cat calling.  
Comfortable with their response, the doctor decided to go get a beer and a hot dog, leaving his assistant in charge. When he returned, there was a riot in progress.  
Finding his missing assistant, the doctor asked:" What in the world happened?"  
The assistant replied: "Well everything was going just fine until this guy walked by and yelled, "Peanuts!"
"The Young Daughter" 
A woman takes her 16-year-old daughter to the doctor. 
The doctor says, "Okay, Mrs. Jones, what's the problem?"  
The mother says, "It's my daughter Darla.  
She keeps getting these cravings; she's putting on weight,   
and is sick most mornings. 
"The doctor gives Darla a good examination,  
then turns to the mother and says, 
"Well, I don't know how to tell you this, but your  
Darla is pregnant-- about 4 months, would be my guess." 
The mother says, "Pregnant?  
She can't be, she has never ever been left alone with a man!  
Have you, Darla?" 
Darla says, "No mother! I've never even kissed a man!"  
The doctor walked over to the window and just stares out.  
About five minutes pass and finally the mother says, 
"Is there something wrong out there doctor?"  
The doctor replies, "No, not really,  
it's just that the last time anything like this happened,  
a star appeared in the east and three wise men came over the hill. 
I'll be darned if I'm going to miss it this time!"
There is a light at the end of every tunnel. Just pray that it isnt a train.  
Foreign aid might be defined as a transfer from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries.  
Those who drink to drown their sorrows should be told that sorrows know how to swim . 
People who think they know what they're doing are especially annoying to those of us who do. 
The gene pool could use a little chlorine.  
May our lives over flow with Gods Love and His Blessings.
"Moments To Remember" 
"Too Young" 
Floyd Cramer 
Ev & Els 
Dear God, 
We ask you to protect our country from those who seek to destroy it.To protect all of its people from the graft and corruption that goes on within our Government and to keep us safe from the terrorists who have now come across our borders and live amongst us.And please God, let our next President be the "people's choice" and  not that of the RNC, Congress, The Elitists and/or The Establishment.   
Please stay with us and stand by us. 
We ask in Jesus name.  
Can you imagine teaching your children to do  
all the evil deeds the Muslim's teach theirs 
to do.  How could they possibly do any thing 
else but go to hell when they die.  They are actually already there.
He truly has an evil eye.  You can just see the devil himself in this man.  She looks the total opposite, but she has just as much devil in her, maybe more even, than Obamass does. They are both Hell bound for sure.
Hi!  My names Miss Frazzie.  
I'm off to do something.   
Aloha Ko'u Hoaloha's