"The Farmer & The Pet Rooster"
A farmer and his pet rooster went everywhere together.
One day they went to a movie and as the farmer got close to the ticket window the clerk said, "I'm sorry but you can't take animals into the theater."
The man looked sad and said "But this is my pet rooster, Clucky. He goes wherever I go.
"Oh, I understand.” but if that is the case "you should not come in either."
The farmer sighed and said, "Well this time I will leave him in the truck!”
So the farmer went around the corner and stuffed Clucky down his pants.
He then went back, got his ticket, went into the theater, and sat down next to two old ladies.
About halfway through the movie Clucky started struggling so the farmer unzipped his pants to let him stick his head out.
The first old lady saw this and turned to her friend and whispered, "Patsy, you’re not going to believe this but the man next to me has just unzipped his pants and let his thing out."
Patsy turned to her friend and said, "Well just ignore him. Besides, at our age, we've seen plenty."
"Well normally I would agree with you, but this one's eating my popcorn!"
A man was walking down the street when he noticed his grandpa sitting on the porch, in the rocking chair, with nothing on from the waist down.
"Grandpa, what are you doing?" he exclaimed. The old man looked off in the distance and did not answer him.
"Grandpa, what are you doing sitting out here with nothing on below the waist?" he asked again.
The old man slowly looked at him and said, "Well, last week I sat out here with no shirt on, and I got a stiff neck ....This was your Grandma's idea."